Recently, a sweet Pennsylvania couple (pictured above) found themselves in a bit of legal trouble after attemping to blow up a perfectly good 2006 Ford Fusion. Although their attempt in pyrotechnics was failed, this may or may not be partially due to them using tampons as a vessel for the flames. Meth may or may not have been involved.
Patricia and Quentin Deshong first did a fair bit of textbook window bashing, and soon opened the hood, followed by the gas cap. Several tampons were lit, and forced into the fuel tank, and also into the oil cap. Thankfully, the couple was unsuccessful in their attempt, and only a handful of tampons and some windows were harmed in this horrifying event.
The local authorities are still trying to determine why these two lovely citizens picked on this particular Fusion. The only connection to be made is that Patricia Deshong and the Fusion’s owner, Falon Clark, are Facebook friends. According to Clark’s status updates, she’s been looking for a little revenge.
When the bobbies arrived at the scene, they found the Deshongs under the influence of alcohol, and possibly crystal meth. Patricia’s thievery skills netted her possession of the Fusion’s license plate and registration, but also a theft charge in exchange. Both of the failed arsonists were released after posting a $50,000 bond between the two. To put the icing on the cake, Patricia’s drunken/disorderly conduct left a lasting impression on the police, as she chose to threaten them by saying she was going to “f***ing kill” a trooper. Lovely.
By the end of the night, the two had racked up the following charges: attempted arson, public drunkenness, criminal mischief, and making terrorist threats. All we can say is that’s four more charges than they would’ve earned, had they paid attention to those D.A.R.E commercials growing up. Say no to drugs, kids…